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What are they thinking?

By Staff | Mar 20, 2020

To the editor:

I went to the store and found toilet paper is gone everywhere. I am told some people come in every morning to buy more when it is restocked.

That makes me wonder — what people are planning to do with the toilet paper?

Make paper airplanes that you can fly but the slightest bit of moisture would make them shrivel? Use them for napkins but it would leave bits of toilet paper on your face? Write on them and keep shopping list but you would have to have a very light pen and the ink would go right through?

Honor a friend by papering his landscape Use it to wipe up spills but it would take a lot of paper even for a small spill? Start a new trend in oil painting? Wrap it around your hands when we endure the bitter 45-degree mornings? Use it for your write-in voting? Write letters to your friends? Make Easter greeting cards? Build a collection? Autograph rolls and give to fans? Try to find a good recipe for Easter using toilet paper?

And don’t forget — leave some hanging out the back when you return from the toilet.

Unless you are quarantined for a couple years, you certainly couldn’t use that much toilet paper for its intended purpose.

What will be next? Buying up all the toilet bowl cleaner?

John A. Benedict

Cape Cora